Kit, Raffi:

And seriously, I mean, shouldn't the guy from Jersey or wherever with the intoxicating beat factory know about hockey? They've got hockey there, he owns a computer through which he can learn about the world, the very least he could have done was lift his snout from his intoxicating beat factory to snuffle "fuck, dude, it's a period."

-Brian

STUPID I REQUIRE YOUR PRESENCE TONIGHT THIS IS NOT A ROBOT IMPERSONATING YOUR BOYFRIEND BLEEP PING CHUNK

Kit:

It is hard to capture the idea of a lilting, wafting musical "bop ba" in text.

-Brian

Raffi:

I've noticed the nodules on Kit's back have become distended of late. Their yellow tint has deepened, causing me to wonder. Since you have an available corpse, I was wondering if you could check it for distended, deepened-yellow nodules, in case they are deadly or whatever. If they are deadly we might begin to fight over Kit's possessions.

I think you should take all his pants because your leg braces will tear right through their flimsy rockstar fabric. In this way Kit's propensity for assuredly charging into conversations and situations he is extremely ill prepared for will be honored.

The nodules also seem wobblier than normal. They wobble at a 17.5 Nodwobble/Angstrom rate, which only deepens my concern, given that he has been hanging out where members of the band "Interpol" have been known to congregate--not merely congregate, in fact, but sluff off huge amounts of organic material formerly attached to the Interpol congress.

Ryan should take all of Kit's vanity products: the shampoos, tweezers, soaps, lotions, deodorants, nail files, hair rejiggerators, and suchlike and so forth. He will use them to clean various parts of himself and his apartment, perhaps rejiggerating various non-hair objects via use of his engineering expertise/genius. In this fashion Kit's tendency towards ridiculous amounts of self-pooferating maintanence will be remembered.

I had a dream last night where I met Johnny Cash and he was everything Johnny Cash should be: kind and forgiving of my gaffes. He mentioned many things about life, nothing about nodules, but I should point out that Johnny Cash recently met his untimely demise and I feel that a dream about Kit is probably forthcoming.

For myself I will take Kit's soul. In this way his soul will be eaten or perhaps placed into slavery, where it will toil with my other souls, creating ghastly works of evil for all eternity.

-Brian

Postal Service, good, good, excellent, sounds like wonder, etc.

Track 4 is great. "Nothing Better" it's called. But Jesus Christ they should have consulted the Tragically Hip:


"I can't accept that it's over; I will block the door like a goalie tending the net in the third QUARTER of a tied-game rivalry"


Jesus FUCKING Christ. Even someone stunningly, stunningly ignorant about hockey, as an indiepop songwriter from the Pacific Northwest may very well be, should know that if the *third* something is the most tense something, it's probably not the penultimate something of a quartet of somethings, it's the ultimate something of a triplet of somethings.

-Brian

PS: What the fuck, the couch, the hair, you're a fucking embarrassment, I wish for Interpol to arrest you for the theft of the Washington Monument, you henchman you.